If Only, My Kitsune, If Only
by scoggzie
Summary: Naruto and Gaara were once together, then Gaara left him, leaving Naruto hurt and confused. When he tries to finally find an end to his pain, a certain sensei finds him and tries to bring him back in touch with the Naruto that once was. KakaNaru
1. Pain: A Prologue

Pain. It was our love, our being, and our life. Every day was painful. He hurt me, and it hurt him to hurt me. A vicious cycle. Day in and day out.

It was like that since I would remember. We met seven years ago. We were young then and so close. We were alike, in our pain, and we felt a connection. When he left to return home I was miserable. I felt so alive with him there.

He returned to me three years ago, and the spark once again ignited. I felt that I needed him even more now, and he could tell. We began to spend time together, alone. Just me and him. The demon and the fox. "My kitsune," he used to say, "My love, I could never leave you."

Lies. All of it.

Soon after, he left me again. And now, here I am three years later. All alone in my small, lonely apartment. Knowing that the first person I ever truly cared about would no longer be mine. He had left me to lead his sand village. And he told me I could not go with him. I heard that when he returned home he was named the Kazekage. 'Gaara, my demon, you should never have left me.' And the kunai pierced my soul.

.:v:.:v:. .:v:.:v:. .:v:.:v:. .:v:.:v:. .:v:.:v:.

In the back of my mind I knew these feelings were wrong. That was why he was still with him. I could have had him, I think. But the guilt was too much for me to bear. He was so young when we met, and I am still so much older than he. He deserves someone younger to love him, someone who can share the excitement of the first time with him, unlike me. I'm used, and I have nothing left to give to anyone. Nothing innocent. And what's more, the things I fantasize about him… I shouldn't keep thinking of him this way. He was my student. But, no, none of that should matter. Love is love.

I looked up at the apartment where my would-be love made his home. There he was. Sitting in his room, thinking deeply.

Oh, how I wish I were there! I know the things Gaara did to him and I hate it! I hate that anyone could do that to Naruto. My little fox. Kitsune: the name of my lover's heart. I want him to be my kitsune, like Gaara, the bastard, had before. But that could never happen. It would be too good for me.

Then, Naruto stabbed his heart, and I rushed into his apartment, and took him to lady Tsunade. I would not let him die. Ever.


	2. Something of a Beginning

I don't own Naruto, you would **know** if I did.

"Naruto."

'Am I dead? It's so… cold. And it hurts.' I moved my hand. I found something warm and I grabbed it, and it grabbed me back. I slowly tried to open my eyes. As I did do I saw the soft expression of a certain silver haired man who had always caught my eye.

"Kakashi?" I said softly. I had always had a sort of childish crush on the sensei and holding his hand was giving me the butterflies.

"Yes, it's me." He said, giving a weak smile. The smile quickly faded, however. "What were you thinking, Naruto? What could possibly lead you to do something so… drastic?!" His voice now lowered from the harsh tone it has taken. "You had me worried." His blue eye looked sadly into mine. Then, just in time to ruin this fantasy, my hunger got the best of me and the loudest growl erupted from my stomach.

"Fuck." I said, throwing my head back on the pillow. "Leave it to my stomach to ruin the moment. Just when it was getting good."

He chuckled at my bit of humor, that I hadn't really intended as humor, I was being honest. This man was someone I had wanted for a long time… even before _him_.

"Since I'm in such a condition… I think I deserve a wish to be granted." I said. "Can I… see your face?"

"That's for another day." He said with a laugh, and I could see his little smile through the fabric. "Let's get you something to eat. How about Ramen? My treat."

"I'm too damn easy." I said, getting up painfully from the nurse bed.

Kakashi stood up as well, helping me to stand. "Maybe being easy isn't so bad all the time." He said, looking me in the eye.

Normally I would have taken that as just any old comment, but since this was Kakashi, and I basically loved the man, I couldn't help but take it as flirtatious. I smiled at him when he looked at me and felt my cheeks heat up. When his smile became coy and he looked at me harder, I just knew he had seen me blush. And if he saw me blush, then he must know that I like him. And if he wasn't creeped out then… maybe he liked me too.

The silent tension was just too much. So I started walking, Kakashi following, continuing to help me stay upright.

After our awkwardly quiet meal, Kakashi took me back up to my room.

"The doctors should be releasing you later today. I've told them to inform me of your release so I can come pick you up. You'll be under my care for the next few weeks, staying in my house, eating my food… using my bed" He said with a wink. Of course, I knew we would not be in the same bed, but the bed I would be sleeping in would be in some way "his".

"Why can I not go home?"

"As a fellow Konoha shinobi I have taken on the mission of keeping you from any further personal harm. As of now the other shinobi and I cannot trust that you will not try such a thing again. I will not let you die." He said all this very professionally. Then in a warmer, friendlier tone, he added, "Also, I just thought it would be fun." And he gave a big smile.

Even thinking back to what I had done made my stomach churn. I certainly did not plan on that happening. Years ago I never would have imagined that I would ever come down to that. Kakashi must have been able to tell what was happening, because he put his hand on my shoulder and said, "I think of us as good friends, and you should know that you can talk to me whenever you need it. Just call and I'll always be there."

I nodded. I understood. More empty promises. More hopes raised only to be dropped again.

"Thanks, Kakashi." I looked up into his one visible eye. "It means a lot."

The walk to Kakashi's house was… uneventful. In my mind I loved it. Kakashi's arm around me, holding me gently but firm, to keep my weakened body next to him. I did feel a bit weird though. I'd never been to Kakashi's house before, and the first time I go is to keep me from suicide. I'd imagined differently.

"Here we are." He said, coming up on a small house near the woods.

The inside was so… nice. It was sort of… odd and unexpected. I had expected more of what you would call a "bachelor pad", but it was really quite… feminine. The furniture all matched and there was art on the walls. There were even matching curtains. Of course, on the far wall, there was a large bookshelf holding the immense quantity of Kakashi's romance novels. Well… maybe his house wasn't so odd after all.

With how large this and the kitchen were, I seriously doubted that there were two bedrooms here. And, as imagined, I was right. There was only one, Kakashi's personal bedroom. Kakashi showed me to his room. A big fluffy bed sat in the center of the back wall, with a black frame and the nicest linens I had ever seen. The paint on the walls was a deep red and all the furniture and curtains were black, like the rest of the house.

"This is where you'll be staying. You can use the bed, and I'll take the couch in this other room." The couch he was referring to looked really uncomfortable. Definitely meant for looks and not for comfort.

"I can sleep on the cou—"

"No. I insist you sleep in my bed." Kakashi said, and he lightly pushed me onto it. "Now I'm going to make some food. _I'll_ bring it to _you_ so Don't. Get. Up." And he left.

'Kakashi's room is so… romantic.' I thought to myself. 'He even has a jar of rose petals over there.' I lay down to rest my eyes and realized that this was the most comfortable bed I had ever laid on.

I woke up to the smell of… something tasty. Having only eaten ramen for most of my life, I didn't really have an acute sense for the smells of other foods, but this one smelled really good. The smell got stronger as Kakashi walked into the room, carrying a plate full of…

"Teriyaki," he said, "you'll like it."

I took one bite of it and told myself 'I really love this man.'

The following morning I had woken up ridiculously early and had to pee really badly. So I walked through the house to the bathroom, noticing Kakashi's sleeping form on the couch. He really was a beautiful man.

After my pee I looked at Kakashi again and thought, 'This is too easy.'

I walked over and lightly grabbed the soft cloth that covered the amazing jaw line of this man. I pulled it down and… he was even more gorgeous than I could ever have imagined! His lips were the lightest pink and looked so soft. I couldn't resist but want to touch them, so I began to inch towards them, my fingers shaking for fear he might wake up with me in this awkward position. I was almost there when my hand was snatched in midair. Kakashi's amazing mismatched eyes shot open, looking right into mine. I was so scared. Now he knew how I felt. He had to.

"I told you that would be for another day," he said solemnly, "but since you seem to like letting urges overwhelm you, I guess it is only right for me to do so as well." He then grabbed my cheek softly and turned it upwards, pulling me closer. Our faces were mere centimeters apart.

Yay! That was my first real chapter. Damn I'm excited. It probably sucked, but it's my first story really… but yeah… if it sucks, tell me so I stop writing it. Please? O.o any criticism is appreciated. Good or bad I guess.


	3. You Won't Remember This in the Morning

If I owned Naruto… I'm not even going to complete that statement.

………………………………………………………………………………………

Trying to sleep with Naruto in my bed was a bit of a difficult task. I knew when I took this last minute mission that he would sleep there, but I guess I hadn't thought it through too well. In my mind I had imagined we would be sleeping together, but when it came down to it that was not the case. He was in my bed alone, and I was on this ridiculously uncomfortable couch, which was, even more, not even long enough for me to stretch my legs.

As I slept, I jumped from dream to dream, as usual. Randomness, until finally, my mind reached its usual destination. Mixing my novels with reality I had the dream of me and Naruto in bed and together. Drawn out sex scenes, plot twists, and the joy of a happily ever after we would never have. I have such an odd brain.

Early the next morning, I halfway woke to Naruto walking past to the bathroom. He looked at me, probably believing I was still asleep. When all he did was go to the bathroom, I dozed back into my dream.

Then someone was touching my face, and my instinct told me to grab them. I did so and I found the familiar warm chakra flow of Naruto. He had apparently not been able to resist the urge to see my face, which I had worked so hard to hide. I found my face not so nice to look at, so I always hid it, and I did a damn good job. When I opened my eyes, I could tell that Naruto was shocked. He hadn't expected me to wake up. I'm a ninja… and he expected me not to notice someone removing my mask. I really hadn't meant to scare him. He looked a little embarrassed. I had figured he may like me, but this blew the bullet. I was convinced.

""told you that would be for another day," I said trying to keep this simple. I didn't want to freak him out with passion or anything. He was Naruto, after all. "But since you seem to like letting urges overwhelm you, I guess it is only right for me to do so as well." Maybe this was our moment. Maybe I could finally have a piece of this beautiful young nin. I started to inch closer, pulling his face towards my own. Our lips, those lips that were oh-so ready for each other, had barely brushed when there was a loud knocking at the door. I was so surprised I jumped out of my spot on the couch right on top of Naruto. There was a painful groan from below me and then silence. 'that was a little embarrassing,' I thought to myself. I got off the poor boy and went to answer the door to see who had interrupted my joy.

"Hey Kakashi," she said, "I heard Naruto was staying here. I'm not too early, am I?"

'A little…' "No, no, no, Sakura… you didn't interrupt anything at all," I said, realizing she had said nothing of interruption.

Coming into the house, I noticed, as well as she, that Naruto was still in a heap on the floor.

"Naruto, you lazy ass! Get up right now! It's just like you to be lying about on Kakashi's floor, probably expecting him to carry you back to your bed!" Sakura yelled. Her expression turned to confusion when she noticed that during her yelling fit she had failed to notice me going to pick the boy up and carry him back to his bed.

"I am sorry for all of that," I said. "It won't happen again." I had almost completely forgotten he was still injured. Apparently Kyuubi had not forgiven him for trying to kill himself and was refusing to heal him quickly as usual. My fall had hurt him more than expected, especially since it was so unexpected, and right in the middle of something so intimate. 'Damn it.' I turned back to Sakura, who had followed me part of the way, "I believe you are a bit to early," and turned back to Naruto, leaving her to show herself out. I was mad she had interrupted our moment, but I was even more upset that she had yelled at Naruto for what was essentially nothing. I had absolutely no problem carrying him back to bed, and she didn't even know the circumstances. Sakura could be so inconsiderate.

…………………………………………………………………………………………

When Naruto woke up later that day, the silence for the next few hours was very awkward. Naruto moved from the bed, to the couch, to the chair, and then back to the bed again throughout the day.

"How would you like to… do something?" He asked when we both ended up on the couch together, which was still awkward from our situation earlier.

"Like what?" I responded, looking over at him.

"I dunno. I'm a little hungry… and I'm just really bored. You said this was going to be fun."

'It would be fun, if _someone_ had not interrupted us earlier.' I thought. "Well what is fun to you?"

"Um… normally I would train or something like that… but I guess I can't right now, can I?"

"No. No not really…" I said with a chuckle. "But you can eat, you said you were hungry."

When we arrived for dinner at the ramen shop, where I was treating Naruto to his usual six bowls of ramen, I would normally have distracted everyone around and eating quickly to hide my face, but Naruto's earlier actions had made this unimportant, since he was really the only person I hid my face from. I thought he would find me ugly, but from the way he looked at me earlier… I'm glad to find that I think he likes it to some extent. And his actions at the ramen shop helped to heighten my self esteem as well, because he only had one bowl of ramen in the amount of time it took him to eat all six, because he couldn't stop looking at me. All I was doing was eating, but it made me feel good to know he couldn't keep his eyes off of me. Finally, I had a reason not to hide my face all the time. Every now and then I would look up at him and he would quickly turn his eyes back to his ramen and continue eating, only to look back at me when I looked away.

When we returned home, we both again sat on the couch.

"Naruto, do you think… you could tell me… why?" I asked, looking over at him with a concerned face.

"Does it really matter? It's not something I think I am going to try again. At the time I felt so low about myself, and that no one cared about me, and that maybe if I took my own life then people would think about me. And miss me. I was also thinking of all the lies people tell me, and how I can never tell if someone is being sincere." He said, looking at his knees.

"Does everyone really lie to you? Because I do not remember ever having done so." I replied, trying to console, though a little upset that he believed I didn't care.

"At some point everyone has. Gaara told me he loved me, and that was a big lie, and a painful one. To think someone loves you and put your whole being into making them happy, forgetting your own well being for them, and then to have them throw it back in your face. I was ready to do anything for him, and then he took it all back. He told me he no longer cared for me, and that I should forget about him. I can't forget though. I can't because I don't understand how someone can just _stop_ loving another person." And now he was crying, and very upset. I pulled his head to my shoulder. This was not Naruto. What had happened to him? "It just hurts. So much."

"I know, Naruto. It's not easy. But sometimes it's just best to move on." I wrapped both my arms around him and pulled him into a gentle hug.

"Thank you, Kakashi." He said into my shoulder, the flow of tears slowing to a stop. "I'm sorry. I should never have done this, any of it."

"It's fine, Naruto. My opinion of you has not changed at all. I do not think any lower of you for this, and think, if you had not done that, we wouldn't not be here together right now, would we?" He shook his head. "That's what I thought. Now let's get you to bed, you still need rest, and it's beginning to get late." He allowed me to help him up from the couch and walk him to the bed. I lay him down on the bed and turned to leave.

"Kakashi, would it be possible for you to… stay with me? I don't want to be alone. I know it must be awkward for you to sleep in a bed with someone who likes men, but I won't try anything." When I looked back, he was sitting up, with the loneliest look in his eyes. I just couldn't resist this boy.

"Of course I will, Naruto. Anything for you. Liking men is not an issue for me, if you haven't noticed the majority of my manga." He smiled and I removed my shirt and slid into the bed next to him.

………………………………………………………………………………………….

In an hour, Naruto had successfully changed positions in the bed about 484,976,467 times, and had finally found his resting place with his back facing me. I began to think to myself of how I could make him love me back. He was apparently not over Gaara yet, and I know from experience that getting over something like that is not so easy. I turned to look at the sleeping boy next to me. As soon as I turned however, I found myself staring right into the wet blue orbs of the Uzumaki boy.

"Will anyone ever love me again?" He said, more tears flowing from his beautiful sad eyes. He was even more lovely when he cried, though I really never wanted him this upset again.

"Of course, Naruto. In fact, I think there are many people who will. Some who even love you right now. So I can, in fact, tell you that yes, someone loves you."

"I guess… I'll… see you in the morning, Kakashi." He said, closing his eyes. When the tears stopped and his breathing steadied, I took the opportunity to touch once again the soft skin of my would-be-lover's face. When he did not wake, I removed my inhibitions as a ninja and showed the sleeping Naruto my true feelings by laying a soft kiss on his headband-less forehead.

"It's true Naruto. Someone does love you," I said to the sleeping Naruto, "if only you could see him right now. He is so in love, but he is ashamed that he can only tell you when you will never hear him and you won't remember anything in the morning."

………………………………………………………………………………..

Yay! I finally finished it! About halfway through I just completely rewrote it… because the original sucked so bad. XD but now it is finished and I hope you enjoyed it. Don't forget to review please! Tell me how much I suck lol. -


	4. Like That Morning After Pill

Writing this took a lot less time than I thought it would O.o … Sorry it took so long for me to write it! I felt bad having not written for a while… so I wrote all of this at school today. Only took me two periods (of 50 minutes each). - (BTW MalaKye, I'm going to put the POV's now… I originally didn't want to use them… don't ask why 'cause I dun know. Ha. But since you suggested it, and I am very open to suggestions, I'll do it. :))

* * *

**Naruto's POV**

'Wow. This bed is a lot warmer than I remember it.' I thought. A slight draft caused me to pull the groaning blanket closer. Damn this blanket was soft… and so warm – wait!

"Gah!" I said, opening my eyes. Suddenly the night's events came back to me and I relaxed in the memory. I had finally gotten up the courage to ask Kakashi to stay with me, which, gladly, he obliged to do. I looked at the clock. "Only Midnight… damn." I snuggled farther into the warmth of his sleeping embrace, acting as a teddy to the man who held my heart. This heart, which was beating so in time with his, was telling me that this guy was the one. Saying he really loves me, you can see it in his eyes when he looks at me. Though, even after all of this, my mind refuses to accept that someone can really love me. Me, the knucklehead who's pushed everyone away. No one could love that. Call me crazy but I think I'm the one who houses the Kyuubi after all.

My lonely thoughts were broken when a sigh escaped the soft lips of the sleeping nin surrounding me. So warm, my heart was telling me, warm like something new, something not yet felt. What was it? But no, my mind wanted cold. It reminded me that the only reason Kakashi was here with me was because I had tried to take my own life. There was no love, only compassion.

Oh, but how I wished my heart was right! I loved him, and I wanted more than anything that the words of my heart would be the truth and Kakashi and I can have our happily-ever-after together.

I left these thoughts to look back at the beautiful creature beside me. I smiled. He had me trapped. My arms were against my chest, useless with his holding me so tightly. I closed my eyes. I wished to stay like this forever.

In what seemed like a moment, the arms around me began to move. 'I don't want to move yet!' I kept myself still, not opening my eyes and creating the illusion of sleep and the movement stopped. Kakashi was holding my hands. A nice gesture, but now the rest of me was cold. 'Thanks, Kakashi'

"Beautiful." I heard. I had to stop myself from gasping like a schoolgirl. My breath hitched, and I could hear my heart pounding in the back of my head. A hand left mine, and brushed my cheek. The hand stopped and was left to rest on my scar-marked cheek, slightly cupping the jaw line. I really felt beautiful right now. I imagined him softly examining my "sleeping" self, and that he took extra care in touching me. "I wish… you would remember…" _Remember what?_ "That you would remember your good night, but…" _Eh?_ Movement. _Don't leave! Keep talking! Wait…_ He was moving towards me, not away. He shifted his entire body right up to mine, our chests touching, legs mixed, giving heat in place of the long lost blankets. "Someone does love you, Naruto. He just… can't…" _EH?_ _I think I know where this is…_ "Damn it, I'm such a coward…" He said quickly. Then, before I knew what was happening, Kakashi's lips were on mine. The one-sided kiss didn't last nearly long enough, as he pulled mere inches away. Our noses were still touching.

_I can't take this…_I thought as I opened my eyes, seeing the surprised look in Kakashi's mismatched eyes as he discovered my wakefulness. "Naruto, I…" His voice trailed off as he realized I wasn't interested in explanations when I took a quick glance at his unmasked lips. They had been so soft. A great bit different than Gaara's had been. In fact, they were nearly opposite. Gaara's lips were rough from the dryness of the desert, and his kisses harsh. While Kakashi's had been so soft, and gentle. I wanted to know what it was like to love him. After holding eye contact for a long time, Kakashi broke it to look down at my lips, a look of need on his face. It was then that I finally moved, moving my arm to touch his cheek with my hand, bringing his gaze back up to my eyes. I tilted my head and lowered my eyes, going in for the kiss I needed so bad…

_His lips crashed into mine in a mixture of lust and rage. I hated it when he was like this. He would come home and have that look on his face that said he was unhappy, and that I was going to be the one punished for it. He would slam the door and walk to me until I was backed into a wall and his body was against mine as I tried feebly to calm him with my hands on his chest. How did we end up like this? He loved me, didn't he? Things used to be so different… What did I do? It must have been me…_

_Throughout the night, even with my screams of pain, he pounded his anger into me with every kiss, every look, every touch, and every painful thrust. There was no mercy in this. He took every ounce of dignity out of me, filling my soul with shame as he took my most sacred areas and defiled them for his own pleasure. As in all things such as this, there has to come a point where my body can't take any more pain, and my cries would turn into groans of pleasure as my love threw all his pain into me. I was glad to take it then, but I felt so dirty after it all. How could someone enjoy this? I must be sick…_

_In the end we would sleep, still connected and twisted together in a heap of sweaty mass, exhausted from the exchange of anger. And in the morning when I woke, Gaara would always be looking at me, sadness in his eyes, and say, "I'm so sorry, Naruto. Please don't leave me, my Kitsune. My love, I could never leave you… please don't leave me. I love you, Naruto. You know that, right?"_

"_Yes, Gaara." I would reply, emotionless, never once looking at him. "I know, and I love you too. I won't leave… I promise."_

Kakashi's POV

So close. And then, I saw a tear. And then another and another until Naruto was in my arms, crying, having abandoned the perfect moment… I was not angry with him though. I just wanted him to be alright again… to stop having to cry.

"Naruto…" I began, stroking the soft blonde locks on the back of his neck.

"You have no id – If only you knew, Kakashi!" He cried, sobbing harder into my already dripping shoulder. "The things… What I've done. How can you say you love me?!"

"Nothing you have done or will do can change the way I feel about you, Naruto. Nothing." I pulled his chin up to look into his eyes. Still so beautiful. "Nothing. Understand?" He nodded, closing his eyes and curling into a ball in my arms.

" I just want… I want him to leave me alone…" He said. "Everything I do… The… guilt I feel is just too much."

"I don't… I don't know what to say…" I said, at an unusual loss for words. He was so sad.

"You don't have to say anything. Just… don't leave me. I don't want to be alone." He looked me in the eyes.

"My love, I could never leave you. I love you, Naruto." I said, his crying stopping suddenly, and his face turning expressionless and calm. "You know that, right?"

He looked away, seemingly into nothingness, and with a voice like nothing said, "Yes, Kakashi. I know… and I… love you too."

* * *

Dun dun dun! That's all for now. Did anyone notice what I meant to be noticed there? I hope so... If you didn't notice anything... I'll give you a hint... REPETITION and EXPLANATION( reread the prologue to get explanation). Just thought I'd point that out, since I included it and all... and it's sorta... . . . important... O.o 

Time to eat! XD Tell me what you thought. If you hate it, tell me. I you love it, PLEASE tell me! I'm in need of some inspiration, and love :'( . My purse was robbed this weekend and all the stuff I love is goonnneeeeee… I'm so sad.


	5. You Ready For This?

**NPOV**

What have I gotten myself into…? Am I really going to… do this again? I don't know if I can handle this. I know he's not Gaara… but I know… things. I know how many people he has been with… and I've heard how… good he is. But I also know how bad I am at that… Gaara used to tell me how bad I was at it… but… the truth was I just never wanted or liked it. Sure, I could have stayed with him forever, but sex was just not really something I was interested in from him… I just don't want Kakashi to be let down from my lack of experience… I also know what Kakashi went through. For a long time he was a very sad and angry alcoholic… why, I don't know. I used to see him leave the liquor store with a couple bags, head back into the woods, and not emerge again for a few days. His lovers, which included both men and women, would go there about four times a week, different each time. Up until now that never bothered me but… what if that was all he saw me as? I know he's been… sweet and all… but people say things, people lie. I need to stop thinking… stop and just go with this. Maybe I'll finally be happy… loved.

**KPOV**

Something doesn't feel right. Did I say something wrong? Now I'm not going to be able to sleep… great. Damn it, Kakashi… Maybe he wasn't ready for this. Maybe I should have just kept quiet. But I can't take back what was said. That might just make things worse… because he said he loves me too.

"Fuck," I said quietly, touching my bare forehead to the softness of Naruto's hair. 'I should have known it was too early for all of this… Maybe he's alright though… just tired or something… I don't know…'

**APOV**

Kakashi finally fell asleep, wrapped around Naruto, his new lover. He was determined to make this last, and to keep Naruto happy. He would do everything in his power to keep him from getting hurt again. He loved him. He really did. Not like all the others… this was so different. This was Naruto. When he woke up the next day, Naruto was facing away from him and hap moved farther away. When Kakashi want to move closer, Naruto turned around, fully awake, to face him. He then moved closer and pulled himself into Kakashi's arms, making them wrap around him. They lay there like that for some time, and then Naruto pulled away and looked into Kakashi's eyes.

"Morning." He said, giving a small smile. Kakashi smiled back his good morning and gave Naruto a peck on the cheek before getting out of bed.

"Breakfast?" He asked after putting on his day-clothes. Naruto nodded and sat up, pulling the covers off the floor to cover his now cold body.

Kakashi went a little overboard with the whole breakfast thing, Naruto thought, smelling what he assumed was way too much food for the both of them. Truth was, Kakashi figured something was the matter with Naruto and wanted to make him feel better. The way to a man's heart is through his stomach, right?

When Naruto finally emerged from the bedroom to see the extent to which Kakashi had overdone, he was almost knocked out by the smells around him. Westerner's breakfast special. Eggs, bacon, waffles, baked beans… ramen. He smiled and sat at the table to eat, a plate full of food being placed in front of him. Naruto ate until he could no more and sat back in his chair, relaxing. Today he wanted to stay with Kakashi… all day. What he really wanted was to just stay in bed with him, but he knew he really should move around… He hadn't done a lot of that recently. Then he had an idea.

"Kakashi, do you think I could start training again today?" Kakashi looked at him for a few moments.

"If you promise not to push yourself too hard. And only if you train with me." He said, giving Naruto a motherly look.

Naruto smiled. "That's what I wanted." They got up and went to get dressed.

Before they went out, Naruto changed his chest bandages carefully for what he hoped would be the last time and threw on a pair of Kakashi's black sweatpants, since he had no training clothes of his own with him. To himself he thought he might keep them. They were rather comfortable. Kakashi did not change, as he was already wearing his training clothes. He was not wearing his mask, however, as he saw no point in wearing it anymore because Naruto had already seen. Besides, apparently Naruto liked his face.

"Before we begin: no jutsu. I don't want you overexerting yourself and using up all your chakra. You need that to continue healing." Naruto nodded and looked at his chest. He crouched down into his ready position and waited for Kakashi.

"I'm gonna kick your ass," he smirked, "even in this condition." He then lunged at Kakashi aiming a punch at his chest.

'Sometimes, I hate myself.' Kakashi thought to himself as he once again got distracted with the attractiveness that was Naruto Uzumaki. To Kakashi he looked so good right now. The too-big sweatpants barely hanging off his fantastic hips and the whole lover abdominal and how, even through the bandaged part, you could see the nice ripples and tonédness. He loved the way they looked as they stretched and twisted with Naruto's movements. He couldn't even fight the boy back he was so distracted. He resorted to dodging and blocking. Defense. It was all he could do. He found his mind drifting to dirtier things as he continued to watch Naruto. He mentally slapped himself and in his mind's surprise he tripped, grabbing Naruto in reflex as he fell to the ground. Kakashi landed flat on his back and Naruto straddled his stomach crookedly, but he straightened up, still sitting on him. Naruto smiled and said, "Told you." As he gave Kakashi's butt a little kick, sliding his foot along the ground to do so. Kakashi just smiled up at him from the ground and gave a little chuckle, unconsciously placing his hands on Naruto's hips as his gaze followed. Naruto noticed this, but did nothing, since he was beginning to like the feel of Kakashi's hands on him. When Kakashi saw that Naruto didn't mind the touch he slipped the tips of his fingers under the elastic band around the top of the sweats, hanging his hands there and giving Naruto a little smile as he looked up peacefully at him. He saw that Naruto's face was a little… empty. His brows pressed together.

"Something wrong?" he asked. Naruto gave a barely noticeable smile and leaned down to press his chest against Kakashi's, their faces very close, and looked into his mismatched eyes.

"Nothing." He replied truthfully. There really was nothing wrong. He was just in thought at the moment. It also didn't help he was lost in the position they were in and just… what Kakashi did to him.

Suddenly Naruto found his hands on either side of Kakashi's face and Kakashi's hands on the lower parts of his bare back, pulling his body closer. Their noses touched for a moment and they pulled back a little, only to return and fill the void into a slow kiss. Their eyes began to close as they continued and they were lost in each other's presence. Kakashi sat up, bringing Naruto to sit in the dip in his crossed legs, leaving Naruto's legs around his waist somewhat. Naruto's hands moved to Kakashi's shoulders and slowly removed Kakashi's vest, leaving only the thin black material of Kakashi's shirt to separate their skin. Naruto ran his hands over Kakashi's chest, feeling the muscles and the bit of sweat that was building up on the man's body from their actions and their training. Kakashi began to rub his thumbs in little circles on Naruto's back as he pulled back from the kiss, Naruto looking at Kakashi's covered chest and Kakashi at Naruto's lovely blue eyes.

"I love you, Naruto." He said still looking at him. "I want you to know that… I feel like you think I don't. And that makes me hurt. And it makes me hate my past. I regret a lot of the things I've done but… I don't want that to carry over into… well… us." At this Naruto looked up into Kakashi's eyes and Kakashi noticed they were a little glazy. He didn't say anything, just looked into his eyes. His eyes flicked to Kakashi's lips and he quickly moved forward to once again attach their lips, pushing Kakashi back like a punch-bob, only for Kakashi to sit back up and hold him tighter as he ran his tongue along Naruto's bottom lip for entrance. The kiss Naruto had given him had caused Kakashi to lose some sense while his lusty nature took a turn. He stuck his hands under Naruto's pants again.

'Am I ready for this?' Naruto asked himself hurriedly when Kakashi shoved his hands in his pants and began to kiss him harder. 'I want it but…'

At that moment, Kakashi had decided to turn his head and deepen the kiss, stretching his neck as Naruto's head moved back. Naruto took this as he was losing control of the situation, which he did not want, and tried to regain that control by grabbing Kakashi's hips and holding him down while he pulled away. He moved his hands underneath Kakashi's shirt and started to pull it up while Kakashi watched him. Naruto noted the haziness of his expression. When he had completely removed the article he took a moment to admire the masterpiece before him. Kakashi had a beautiful body under all those clothes. Naruto thought he should show it more. There were scars, but that was to be expected. They just added to his appeal, so Naruto thought.

Naruto leaned down to start a trail of kissed from Kakashi's shoulder to the bottom of his collarbone. Kakashi kissed the top of Naruto's head as he trailed and started trying to pull on Naruto's pants as the boy began to nip and suck at the bottom of his neck. Naruto stopped what he was doing for a moment to wonder whether Kakashi really wanted that right now. He could tell that he himself did, as he glanced down at his own pants and noticed the tent now somewhat visible through his pants. Regardless of inhibition, Naruto lifted himself to have the clothing pulled off his legs, and realized the questionable position he was in when he saw Kakashi looking right at his crotch as he removed his pants. When Kakashi made a move to rub his leg, Naruto sat back down quickly and looked into Kakashi's face once more. Kakashi looked back at him and played with the elastic of Naruto's boxers. He wanted him so bad, but was he ready for this? This was Kakashi's inward battle. Naruto was busy telling himself that if anything he didn't want began to happen he would leave. And if Kakashi really cared about him, he would understand. If he didn't care and he just wanted Naruto's body for his own personal pleasure, he would come after him pleading.

Naruto made the first move, leaning back on Kakashi's lap to allow the man to remove his boxers. Kakashi was surprised at the move and slowly moved to remove them. When he had them almost over the boy's member he pulled them down quicker in his impatience and was surprised at the size of his new lover. Not that he was complaining. When the boxers had been fully removed, Kakashi could see Naruto for all he was, and he was "packin" in the words of Kakashi's mind. He looked down at it in admiration and then looked up at Naruto with a lusty-hazed smirk that made Naruto a little nervous. Kakashi spoke in a husky voice as he reached for Naruto.

"You ready for this?"

* * *

Soooo... yeah REALLY sorry for how long that took . 

I was SO stuck O.O

Anyways, now that it's here, tell me what you think? And ALSO, whether or not they should continue, or stop, or continue but stop at some point. Like... what do you want? XD Teh story ish fo yoos anywayses. Might as well know what you guys want.

Oh... And also, should I continue with the NPOV andKPOV, or just leave it in the APOV? Dunno if the different POVs bother you. I wrote this one a bit different than the others... I just noticed. So I can go back if you like the old way. I'll even... rewrite the chapter. XDD I'm too nice. lol.


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